I know I still have 26-ish weeks to make any final decisions on this, but right now, these are my feelings...Lately, I'm feeling very ambivalent about breastfeeding the new baby. Let me explain: My firstborn is 14 months and he's still nursing. I've been trying to wean him for 2 months now and it's not going well. He's almost obsessed with nursing. He would probably rather still nurse for his meals than eat his food. (I don't let him do that, of course) He still wakes up every couple of hours at night and wants to nurse back to sleep. He is getting better with that lately, but it's still happening. I offer his pacifier and that works sometimes but other times he cries until I let him nurse. I've talked with his pediatrician about all this and he said to keep trying to wean him slowly and don't force it by going too fast or it will cause him to cling to it that much more. If I wasn't pregnant again, I would probably be completely fine with him still nursing, but being pregnant I feel like I'm just done with it. My plan is to have my son completely weaned by the time this baby is born. I do not want to tandem nurse. I loved nursing my son up until we started the weaning process. But now I almost feel as if I'm starting to resent it. I hate that I feel that way, but I can't help it. I do want to nurse the new baby for the first six months at least, but I know that I just can't go through this again with another nursing-obsessed baby and I'm afraid that's what will happen. I feel like I haven't gotten a good nights sleep since I was pregnant the last time. Also, my son refused to take bottles. I think that was because I waited until he was almost a month old to introduce them because I was afraid he'd get nipple confusion. So, since he didn't take bottles that meant I couldn't really leave him with a babysitter for any length of time. With the new baby, I plan to breastfeed until 6 months then possibly wean to formula. And I plan to introduce bottles of pumped breastmilk as soon as the baby and I establish a good nursing relationship and I'm comfortable that he/she won't get nipple confusion. Because I'm going to need some time to myself, some time to go on a date with my husband or spend some quality one on one time with my oldest and I will need to leave the baby with a babysitter (usually my mother-in-law or my mom) in order to do this.

So I need any advice on anything I've mentioned. I may not have done a good job explaining all this because I'm in kind of a hurry to type it all out, but I appreciate any insight you may have. Thank you

Hey, Mandi! I think your plan for the new baby is perfect. Absolutely. So, I don't think you need advice on that. I think you just need encouragement on weaning your son right now. It looks like you have time to get it all worked out. I know you think about all this constantly, and you want it "fixed" right now. I assume that he drinks from a sippy cup during the day? So, just make sure he's eating and drinking like a big boy during the day and slowly take away a nursing session each night (I don't know, say the 12 a.m. feeding doesn't happen for a whole week, then the next couple of weeks take away the 4 a.m. feeding). ? I think if you just try to focus on one day and week at a time, you'll make it. I don't know what to tell you as far as getting him back to sleep, but I guess try to just give him the pacifier and lay him back in the bed. Make sure you don't turn on lights, talk, or anything like that. Can your husband help get him back to sleep so he doesn't "want" or smell you? Maybe if it's "only dad with no boobs" he'll get the message a lot better. I'm in a hurry now, too, so I'll check back in on this later. Best wishes!

Thank you for your advice! I've tried to get my husband to get up with him but there are times when I can't even wake him up I guess I'm just frustrated because it's taking so long. I don't mean that in a bad way...but I didn't know it would be this difficult. All the articles I've read make weaning sound so simple and it's just not. At least not for us. I have to keep reminding myself that weaning is a process and not an event. Thank you once again